Monday, September 22, 2008

Disgusting Pregnancy Facts


No one ever tells you that:

1. Pregnancy makes your underwear smell like a petting zoo.

2. Your numerous farts will be disproportionate to ANYTHING you could possibly have eaten. For example: I had an orange earlier today and for the next four hours I farted what had to have been gorgonzola-covered chili beans that sat in the backseat of my car for eight days in direct sunlight.

3. You will be unable to keep your eyes and hands off your own boobs.

4. That might just be me.

2 comments:

Savingthebay said...

You speak the truth. This is why I could never be a woman. I would just hang out all day long playing with my own boobs.

skroll said...

See, I forgot about all that which is a good thing, because if we clung to all the painful, disgusting things that happen during pregnancy/childbirth, no one would EVER do it a second time (not that I am) I'm just sayin'